I have a special talent. I’m usually quite an agreeable, pleasant and mostly reserved person, but when I’m angry, I either shut down or I really talk and I won’t be able to stop. Everything has to come out and like a steam engine, my words spill out in an impassioned diatribe. I make all these resolutions to watch my words and be quiet especially when faced with many different opinions I have for the people around me. I realise that a lot of the time, that certain opinions I have may cause friction so I bottle them up until I can take it no more and it all comes spilling out, usually not in a good way. Worse still, when I get angry or upset, I lose control of my tongue sometimes and say some very harsh things, even to loved ones.
“There is one whose rash words are like sword thrusts, but the tongue of the wise brings healing.” Proverbs 12:18
Which one are you?
I like to believe that I edify and encourage with my words, and I try to watch the words that come out of my mouth but I find my tongue is still far from being tamed. “I tell you, on the day of judgment people will give account for every careless word they speak…” Matthew 12:37. The words that we speak can be a marker for how spiritually mature we are as christians. I have spoken many careless words and they reveal to me that I am still on the very long journey towards maturity. I thank God that we have the holy spirit to guide us and convict us of times when we sin with our tongues so we can repent.
Only a week ago, I had to apologise for the part I played in the breakdown of a conversation with a close relative that went downhill really fast. Instead of tackling the issue, we focused on each other and I listened to myself as I tore someone I loved down with my words. I find it very shameful till this day the I didn’t control myself. I felt justified by the actions that led up to the moment and instead of taking a step back to assess the situation, I chose not to.
HIS word says “But I say, walk by the Spirit, and you will not gratify the desires of the flesh.” The simple truth is that a Christian who is plugged in will find it easier to tame the desires of the flesh. When you start to behave in a manner that is as odds with the word of God, check your spiritual gauge…it’s probably low. It’s time to go back to his word and to seek his presence once again. It’s also time to use your tongue for something more productive.
“my tongue shall tell of your righteousness and of your praise all the day long.” Psalm 35:28.
If my tongue is busy praising, I don’t think there will be much time for quarelling. I realise that a lot of it is ego and a lack of humility. My opinion can be given in love but its not my place to keep pointing out flaws and forcing a change in anyone. My part is to love and that’s what I have been called to do…the rest is to be left to God, for him to complete his work to his glory, not mine.
Dear Lord please use me to love, encourage and uplift your people. I pray that when I open my mouth, I speak life and not death and may your Holy Spirit help me, as I learn bridle my tongue and be prudent with my lips. In Jesus Name. Amen.
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PS Our Bible Study on Marriage starts on the 1st of February and we will be using the most amazing resource. An audio teaching on marriage by TIM KELLER. It’s he all-time bestselling sermon series from Redeemer Presbyterian Church, preached in 1991, and the basis for the bestselling book “The Meaning of Marriage” in 2011.You can purchase them HERE for only $2.50 per session. I am in no way affiliated with the Redeemers Presbytarian Church but I was blown away by his teaching. You can also purchase the marriage book for a deeper study (it’s on the side bar). I can’t wait to start.
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